Descent

by
Tim Lejeune ©2003


 

Spat out into the dark corners
cold slime crystallized to being
the dense, sombre mist,
it all collides, into me,
into this, where I hide,
the only place where I can see
and I see I am not to be,
not to be seen, I see,
I see the pity they would feel
I see the envy which would feed
upon my paleness, upon my grave eyes,
I sense you crave, for my long, frail,
spirit.

Could you care for me, this dim flickering light
You, from that lush green girthed world,
You, with your concrete dreams and steady pay,
You, who do not belong here,
Why have you come, why do you look, so eagerly
Why should you give a fuck about this creature, this
monster,
This freak?

Have you come to mock my small figure,
Have you come to drink from my hunger?
Are you here to kill me, to smother me with anger,
Suffocate me with lust?
Would you watch me die if it pleases you to crush,
Would you watch me crumble to dust?
Would you kill me quickly if I begged?

Would you kill me if I longed for your cruel blade,
Your harsh words, your merciless gaze,
Would you kill me if you felt like it, if I felt like
Giving myself up to your throbbing human desires?
Would you take this whiteskinned body and let me suck
your neck, let me rob you gently of the light of day
so we can dance in the grave, dance in this tomb,
can you feel the lure of the icecold eternity?
Do you think we could mate so I could finally lie
And have you plagiarize my final existence,
My time, my precious, my song of sadness and pain,
So I can finally feel rage and exact the old debt,
So that I may finally sleep again?